Art by epoole88 (wow)
The second season begins on Wednesday, and it’s time for predictions featuring everyone’s favorite prognosticator, Keith, a Coin! (Also, me and Ian.)
For the uninitiated, Keith, a Coin, is an actual coin, specifically a 2014 Philadelphia-minted quarter. Is there a hometown bias? We shall see. Last year he picked correctly exactly in about half of series, so I’d say he’s fully calibrated.
Dallas Stars vs Minnesota Wild
Peter: Whatcha gonna do when run-and-gun runs-and-guns wild on the Wild? (That was awful, I’m sorry.) Dallas is too fun to lose. Stars in 6.
Ian: Alan May’s second favorite NHL team is going to destroy the Wild. You’re welcome, Dario Mouse and Vermy Fox. Jamie Benn is one of the most talented players in the league and how do you game plan for that guy? Plus the Wild have struggled with adversity all season long. They will learn the same lesson the Caps learned two season ago. If you dance with The Oates, the Hockey Gods come for your throat. Stars in 4.
Keith: Stars
St. Louis Blues vs Chicago Blackhawks
Peter: For the first time in two years, I don’t think the Hawks will win the Cup (sorry, Aileen), and they won’t have an easy time in the first round. But still: Hawks in 7.
Ian: Two words: Brouwer Pouwer. Sure the Caps steamrolled the Blues on Saturday. But they’re a much better team than that and they’re coached by a future Hall of Famer. Plus after Patrick Kane’s uh, tumultuous, offseason and how the Blackhawks organization handled themselves, they deserve to be bounced. Blues in 7. Micah’s probability machine agrees with me.
Keith: Hawks.
Anaheim Ducks vs Nashville Predators
Peter: I’ve been wrong about the Predators more than any other team. Let’s do it again. Ducks in 6.
Ian: It’s the battle of Former Capitals Who Owned Our Heart. I really want the Ducks to win because Bruce deserves to feel something other than despair, but Filip Forsberg is here to ruin all our lives. (And I think you know what I’m getting at here.) Preds in 6.
Keith: Predators.
L.A. Kings vs San Jose Sharks
Peter: The Kings are gonna be conference finalists at least. Kings in 5.
Ian: Hard to go against the Kings here, though how funny would it be if Joel Ward scores the game-winning goal in a coin flip Game 7? It won’t happen, but let me dream. Kings in five.
Keith: Sharks.
Florida Panthers vs New York Islanders
Peter: Jagr forever, dammit. Panthers in 7.
Ian: It’s my first upset special. Cal Clutterbuck would hate to be the Panthers. Those scrappy Islanders will find a way. You watch. Isles in 7.
Keith: Panthers.
Tampa Bay Lightning vs Detroit Red Wings
Peter: Detroit squeaked in, but I think they’re stronger than the Stamkos-less Bolts. Give me the Wings in 7.
Ian: With all the drama surrounding Pavel Datsyuk, it’s hard for me to get behind the Red Wings. But I agree with Peter. Petr Mrazek has had one hell of a year. He’s going to be that one hot goaltender that nobody can get a shot past. Plus Mike Green. I’m not picking against my main man Mike Green. Banana Power. Wings in 6.
Keith: Lightning.
Washington Capitals vs Philadelphia Flyers
Peter: Team of destiny. Caps in 5.
Ian: For those of you who think the Caps are hot s^%& and going to waltz right to the Stanley Cup Final, you’ll learn in this series what the definition of true misery is. This series will go seven games. At many points during the next week and a half, you will stare at your TV and say to yourself: how are the Flyers a better team? But in the end, I have something that trumps all of that: a chip of destiny. Caps in 7 and it’s going to be miserable.
Keith: Flyers. (Wow, Keith. Just wow.)
Pittsburgh Penguins vs New York Rangers
Peter: The Penguins are great and the Rangers are a terrible team who just happen to have a Lundqvist. Upset special! Rangers in 7.
Ian: If only both teams could play with swords instead of hockey sticks and annihilate each other. Instead, one team must move on and I am begrudgingly picking the Penguins. Penguins in 6.
Keith: Penguins.
Your turn: Share your picks below. [Winning team] in [number of games].